Couple speaks out on myths and misconceptions of the ‘Swinger’ lifestyle

Episode 45: The Biggest Swinger Club in California
October 18, 2017

It’s a topic that, when mentioned, likely raises eyebrows, questions, and even judgment.

When a couple admits to being part of an “Open Relationship”, opinions usually, and easily change.

But why?

Swinging, as some refer to it, is not illegal, but it’s also a controversial issue.

For Veronica and her husband Eddie, both enjoy separate careers in similar fields, and both are active within the community.

Both also enjoy relationships outside of their own.

When asked about whether it’s about sex, or if there’s more to it, Veronica said it depends of who is being asked the question.

“I have met plenty of people who really just enjoy having variety of sex, and then there are people, like my husband and I, who really are interested in developing relationships with people,” said Veronica.

Veronica and Eddie have known each other for nearly a decade, and they have been married for three years. Both are what some consider “Swingers”.

Veronica and Eddie, however, call it a “Sex-Positive Open Relationship”.

“We didn’t engage with others, you know, inside of our relationship until sometime later,” said Veronica. “I think it was really important for us to really solidify our bond and foundation.”

“What I discovered later was that I wanted a monogamous relationship for a time, not for a lifetime,” said Eddie.

Eddie and Veronica are part of a group of approximately 13 million people in the United States — that’s according to the Electronic Journal of Human Sexuality — that engage in the “Swinging” lifestyle. Even with that statistic, however, their choices are viewed as taboo.

As a result, their identities are concealed.

“As to why, in an age where we are dealing with different  pronouns and gender identity and gay marriage and all of is those things — is it really just a strong fear of sex, and is it really a strong fear that if you participate in those types of things, somehow, one way or another it makes you deviant or it makes you a wild card, all those different things,” said Veronica.

“Our country was founded by the Pilgrims, which thought sexuality was horrible,” said Ina Mlekush, an accredited marriage relationship sex counselor. Mlekush said our society’s base foundation would have to change, in order for this type of lifestyle to be widely accepted.

“That’s why it’s gone underground. That’s why there are millions of people who have entered an alternative lifestyle,” said Mlekush.

There are legends that that couples who participate in the “Swingers” lifestyle leave objects in front of their home to identify their “openness”. People interviewed, however, said that is an urban legend that is easily put to bed.

“I don’t drive up and down the streets looking for anyone,” said Veronica. “Nothing wrong with that, I suppose, but I would find that a little bit odd, and if you knocked on my door and said, ‘hey, the rocks in your yard look like you might be one of those I people’, I would probably call 911.”

“I think that if someone is open to it and looking for it, you can find it,” said Eddie. “It’s not that hard.”

A simple online search will result in the information some might be seeking, and that someone could be a neighbor, friend, or even a family member.

“They don’t want to open up the Pandora’s Box,” said Mlekush. “They just want to open their marriage.”

Key to a successful open marriage, according to Mlekush, is communication. Rules have to be set ahead of time, and strictly adhered to.

It’s also the reason Eddie and Veronica said they have grown closer.

“We discuss everything, like details, and we check in with each other along the way, ‘hey, is this too much detail?'” said Eddie. “And so, because of that, it’s been so much easier to for me going through the process.”

“We can talk about what do people do when they go to a swinger party, or when you have that first conversation with a potential love,r we can talk about the nitty-gritty of the actual acts, but let’s leave that to Fifty Shades of Grey,” said Veronica. “I mean, this is really for me. This is really about being an empowered, freely expressed human being in living relationships, and having fun and not being ashamed of it.”

Eddie and Veronica have engaged in relationships together with another couple. They experience individuals relationships as well. Their hope is only to express their freedom to feel loved, especially by one another, and eventually be accepted for doing just that.


Syndicated from: http://www.fox10phoenix.com/news/arizona-news/couple-speaks-out-on-myths-of-the-swinger-lifestyle

Matt & Bianca
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Matt & Bianca

Matt and Bianca are avid swingers, writers, video bloggers, podcasters, world travelers and all around sexy.

info@everybodyswing.com
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Matt & Bianca
Matt & Bianca
Matt and Bianca are avid swingers, writers, video bloggers, podcasters, world travelers and all around sexy.info@everybodyswing.com

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